This is a biggie and no one told me! We had been married about a year and I had just rededicated my life to the Lord when the phone calls from an old (female) friend began to call my husband. I’m sure it was innocently intended but something in my belly didn’t sit well. She was excited to talk to my husband Bill because she recently changed careers and it was similar to his line of work.
They used to be in the same “running club” and she thought it would be great if they could get together for a run or lunch and talk about her business ideas. Her plan was to maybe even start a business with my husband. WHAT? He told me that they were going to meet for a run first thing in the morning and I have nothing to worry about because she is married and so is he. Ha!
How did I respond? I’m not a great runner… We have a young child…
I said, “If you are going to go on a run with her than Josh (our son) and I are going too!”
At the crack of dawn all three of us show up at Memorial Park to meet her. That was the one and only run, but the calls didn’t stop!
I had just heard a timely message and it confirmed the feeling I had in my gut. The message was that when a male and female are meeting “one on one” there is intimacy that sparks. The only intimacy that I wanted to spark was between my husband and myself. I explained to my husband that I thought it was fine that he hangs out with his “female” friend but I felt we should connect with her family and our family and not them “one on one”. He knew I was serious and he honored my request. We met together as families maybe two times and then we haven’t kept up since.
Not too long ago a “friend” of mine on Facebook changed his status to read “in a relationship”. I thought this was interesting because the last I knew he was newly married. It peeked my interest of why he is now in a new relationship so I scrolled down his Facebook page. I discovered that he and his ex-wife went on a cruise a not too long ago. The next month she made a comment about going home to visit her family and an old “male” friend said they should go on a run together. Twelve months later she had a baby with her running partner and had divorced her husband.
I don’t know for sure, but I imagine that if she or her husband had boundaries in place that this would have never happened. If you are reading this you may think, I would never do that… and that may be true but we do have any enemy. His entire plan is to steal, kill and destroy your marriage. He does not come to you with bells and whistles, it is always in a very subtle way. It is much easier to establish boundaries than it is to repair a broken home after the enemy had his way!
Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate. Mark 10:9